Cop-Out--the competition: the official school newspaper

Just for comparison's sake, here is page one of the official school newspaper, "Hi-Lites." It reflects the standard "school newspaper" format of the time, and was actually pretty good. We should have tried to recruit the female staff of the "Hi-Lites" (especially the girl I had a secret crush on) to the "Cop-Out;" they certainly had the more attractive reporters. Note in column Two the ignominious defeat of the Brainiacs (Colbert and I); our chemistry entry to the Science Fair was trounced by "Tiny Bubbles," "The Quest for Polywater," and "Steps in Making Moonshine," which obviously should have won first prize.